The Case of The Cantankerous Carcass

The Case of The Cantankerous Carcass
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 270
Release: 2017-08-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383334

How is a medieval monk supposed to investigate a death if the corpse keeps complaining all the time? Once more Brother Hermitage toils to avoid his duties as King's Investigator, and fails miserably. But this time it's personal. When his beloved old Abbot arrives at Wat the Weaver's workshop asking for his aid, Hermitage cannot refuse. He only has one beloved old Abbot, after all. But this one comes with a web made by specially tangled spiders. There are Normans involved of course, so far so normal. Add a monastery that no monk of sense would go anywhere near and a village of pagans whose answer to every problem is to set light to it and Brother Hermitage is out of his depth almost immediately. Wat and Cwen the weavers bring some common sense to the situation, but there isn't much of that to begin with. It's medieval crime with all of the normal human failings - and a few new ones as well. People laugh out loud at Howard of Warwick. 5* "I laughed out loud." "Hilarious and very funny." "This series just gets better and better."

The Case of The Curious Corpse

The Case of The Curious Corpse
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 288
Release: 2017-05-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383326

More medieval crime comedy; the genre that hides in the bushes and makes strange noises. Brother Hermitage is compelled to yet another investigation by the sight of a most curious corpse. Helpful compulsion also comes in the shape of a dozen well-armed Norman soldiers and the King’s man Le Pedvin, who will probably stab him if he doesn’t get on with it. Clearly this a Very Important Victim. Suspicions are raised by a host of fascinating characters, including Hereward the Wake, all of whom claim to have loved the victim dearly, but who all benefit from the death in one way or another. It’s also a bit odd that King William insists that he is not to blame, despite boasting about being the killer of an awful lot of other people. On top of all that there is even a rival for the role of Investigator. As Hermitage doesn’t want to be an investigator that’s good, isn’t it? Ploughing in with Wat and Cwen at his back, side and sometimes in front, Brother Hermitage relies on his well established methodology (hoping something occurs to him at the last minute). With all that's going on around this particular death, that might not be enough... The mysteries of Brother Hermitage have been variously described as “hilarious”, “laugh out loud funny”, “side-splitting”, and “stupid” - which is a bit of mystery in its own right. Go on, give it a try…

The Case of The Clerical Cadaver

The Case of The Clerical Cadaver
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 268
Release: 2016-10-27
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 0992939399

It’s new, it's medieval and it’s all very silly…. A hidden monastery in the depths of England’s depths? A secret that could rock the church to its core? A trail of clues that can only be interpreted by an expert? This all sounds rather familiar…. Except the expert is Brother Hermitage, so I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Called once more by King William - who doesn’t even know what he’s calling for - Hermitage, Cwen and Wat the weaver set off to deal with the greatest mystery of all. A mystery that has been protected and guarded for years by a secret brotherhood sworn by awful oaths. A mystery only known to a priest who now happens to be dead. A mystery hidden in a monastery that isn’t even supposed to exist. A mystery of such value that the unscrupulous and greedy are also after it, and these particular unscrupulous and greedy know Brother Hermitage very well indeed. Will all be revealed in a satisfactory manner? Will the convoluted trail lead to a revelation of staggering significance? Hardly. This is a Chronicle of Brother Hermitage, after all…. CAUTION: Not for the historically humourless. Howard of Warwick has previous form... “Absolutely hilarious” 5* “I laughed, I had tears running down my face” 5* “Stupid” 1* Need I say more... you have been warned.

The Bayeux Embroidery

The Bayeux Embroidery
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 261
Release: 2019-02-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1999895983

The Bayeux Tapestry is no laughing matter. Well, apart from the rude bits, obviously. The nuns of Kent have been commissioned by Earl Odo to create a great tapestry telling the glorious history of the Norman conquest of Britain. But when they start dying, one man must be sent for; Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator. Who would commit such a heinous crime? Odo himself? Another nun, perhaps? Some Saxons? The Archbishop of Canterbury? The people of the marshes? Well, it could be anyone really, and that’s generally a problem for Brother Hermitage. With Wat and Cwen, erstwhile weavers of “adult” tapestry themselves, he must solve the crime or face the consequences; as usual. The best plan is probably to wander around Kent rather hopelessly, and trust that something occurs to him right at the end; also as usual. At least in this tale the truth of the Bayeux Tapestry will be revealed: (well, a truth, perhaps) How did it come to be? Who made it? And who thinks that they should have been given the job instead? It’s the lucky 13th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage The man who barely survives his own investigations. The sleuth who seldom asks anyone the right questions. The monk who is firmly medieval and slightly detective. People have said things: ‘Hilarious’ ‘Laugh out loud’ ‘Like Pratchett does 1066’

The 1066 via Derby

The 1066 via Derby
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 265
Release: 2020-04-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383075

The Normans are in town; beware, be careful or be dead… From multiple Best Selling author Howard of Warwick comes more medieval mystery, but not as we know it. First there was medieval fiction, then there was the medieval detective, now the whole business has simply got ridiculous. And Howard of Warwick must be held to account. Medieval crime comedy didn’t even exist until he started interfering... An old wise woman of Derby is dead, and Brother Hermitage has been asked to deal with her. Which means she must have been murdered; people only die of murder when Brother Hermitage is in town. And if she was murdered, who on earth would do that to an old wise woman in her own hovel, for goodness sake? The Norman soldiers camping just down the road? Quite likely. The local people who seem to have good reason to hate her? Quite possibly. Anyone who wanted to steal her ill-gotten gains? Quite feasibly. Very well, quite a few people would want to kill an old wise woman in her own hovel, Brother Hermitage just has to work out which one. Can’t be hard, surely? But this is Brother Hermitage, and the characters of Derby are being less than helpful - as well as pretty peculiar. In The 1066 via Derby Brother Hermitage is once more disappointed by the moral standards of the average 11th Century killer. Stumbling through a host of conclusions, one of which must be right, surely, and a small host of extra murders just for completeness, Hermitage uncovers crime of a truly despicable nature. The guilty must face the consequences of their actions and pay the price - but that’s someone else’s business, Hermitage only does investigation. Comments are consistent: 5* Another Fun Filled Advemture 5* OH MY! 5* And Howard of Warwick has done it again!!! 5* Ha, ha, ha! Aha! Brother Hermitage does it again. 5* Excellent work 5* Please Sir when is the next one coming? 5* Another success 5* Another masterpiece from Howard! 5* Top marks as usual

Not Another Murder

Not Another Murder
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 243
Release: 2024-06-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383644

Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)

The King's Investigator Part II

The King's Investigator Part II
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 252
Release: 2020-11-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383148

Medieval Crime Comedy is not supposed to be a thing, yet here is book No 20. 100,000 sales and 1000 reviews including things like 5* "hilarious and fun". And now there's more investigation for Brother Hermitage just when you thought he’d given up that sort of thing. The King's Investigator Part II, surprisingly following on from Part I, finds that things have not improved. But this time it’s a missing person and there isn’t a murder at all; well, perhaps just a little one. And this is a Very Important Missing Person who needs urgent investigation, whether Hermitage likes it or not. Following a completely blatant trail that even Hermitage can track, he has to call upon the help of people he'd really rather not call upon at all. He has to go to places he'd rather not go and face consequences better not faced. A chase upriver means a boat - and we all know who that means. And worst of all, there’s the suggestion that someone might be after Wat’s money! Of course, the Normans are making things as difficult as ever but now he has people harassing him from all sides. There are more forces at play than seems decent for one investigation. And who’s this hiding in the woods? Surely not…. Read Part II and rest assured that there is no Part III. People have talked about the King’s Investigator before they even knew it was only Part I. 5* Side-splitting, laugh a minute addition to the series. 5* Please, Howard of Warwick, give us more 5* Wonderful, laughing aloud as I was reading this. 5* Another masterpiece from the quill of Howard of Warwick, gut-bustingly funny from start to finish 5* Another winner from our master of comedic medieval murder mysteries! Unlike most, we also report the lowest rating! 3* I would like a longer story and it felt like this was the end of the series, which made me sad.

The Domesday Book (Still Not That One)

The Domesday Book (Still Not That One)
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 223
Release: 2018-06-25
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1999895932

On the coat tails of the best-selling Domesday Book (No Not That One), someone has let out volume II of William’s Adventures in England. As if one book of this sort of thing wasn't enough... It's history, but not as we know it. England, 1067-ish and the King’s grip is tight. His Earls of Northumbria will keep dying though. Every time he appoints one, someone sticks something in them, or sets light to them. Something is going on and he has a strong suspicion who's behind it. If he's right, it could mean real trouble. In Viking Vinland, the man who would be king awaits rescue - and waits. If no one else is going to do it, he will just have to rescue himself. There's only a bit of sea to cross, he will sail home and take his throne by force. Although he might need a bit of help. And then there are the Danes and the Scots who have their own ideas. If Volume I is anything to go by, this situation is a recipe for disaster. And if you’ve got the recipe, you might as well make a disaster. The text books would have you believe that everything in the past was carefully planned and organised. That the leaders of the time were clear in their aims and decisive in their actions. That the people knew what great events they were living through. No one made mistakes, no one incompetent ever got to be in charge and above all, no one ever had a laugh. All that changed with Howard of Warwick. The 16th book to do things to history that it never asked for, returns to the aftermath of the most famous date ever. 1066. Well, the year after actually, no one ever talks about that - and with good reason, it was chaos. Caution: contains facts. What they said of The Domesday Book (No, Not That One) ‘Had me chuckling the whole way through,’ Discovering Diamonds. 5* ‘Brilliantly humorous,’ 5* ‘A laugh riot,

Murder 'Midst Merriment

Murder 'Midst Merriment
Author: Howard of Warwick
Publisher: The Funny Book Company
Total Pages: 234
Release: 2023-07-24
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1913383547

Amazon top 20 best seller, Howard of Warwick delivers a Medieval Crime Comedy for our times. Of course, if anyone is unable to keep up with the times, it’s going to be Brother Hermitage. Now nominated for the CWA 2024 Historical Dagger award. Influencers, the nature of truth, state propaganda? And all nearly 1,000 years ago. Some things never change. When conflicting versions of the Norman Conquest are offered to the people of Derby, Brother Hermitage is in the audience to hear both sides. But, if Brother Hermitage is in the audience, someone is at serious risk of ending up less alive than they used to be. As Wat and Cwen the weavers point out, Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator of murder, after all, was standing right there when the deed was done. How can he not know who did it? Well, he will simply have to investigate as he always does, and the facts will be revealed. Unfortunately, everyone seems to have their own version of the facts and they can’t all be right. When even the liars are lying about their lies, and the people who know the truth don’t know that they know it, things are bound to be confusing. But someone has been shot. With a bow and arrow, a rare item in Anglo-Saxon Derby. Someone must have seen something. And in this case, everyone is talking. They just aren’t saying anything reliable. Never fear. Brother Hermitage will knock this investigation on the head. Unless someone knocks him on the head first, of course. Non mitterent nuncio, as Hermitage might say. Don’t shoot the messenger. Oh, too late. The 29th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage carries the familiar warning; if you like your historical mysteries serious and sombre, look away now. 5* Hilarious medieval murder 5* Another hysterical masterpiece 5* Good humour and funny, clever characters