How to Be an Adult in Relationships

How to Be an Adult in Relationships
Author: David Richo
Publisher: Shambhala Publications
Total Pages: 313
Release: 2021-11-02
Genre: Self-Help
ISBN: 1611809541

This beloved book has touched hundreds of thousands of lives with its profound and actionable advice. Retaining the core message of becoming more mindful in our relationships, this edition includes new and revised material that addresses how we live and love today. A new preface touches on David Richo’s experience with the book over time and outlines the key updates, including attention to online dating and modern communication styles as well as new perspectives on anger and ending relationships. “Most people think of love as a feeling,” says Richo, “but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present.” How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships. Adult love is based on a mutual commitment to what Richo calls the “five A’s”: attention, acceptance, appreciation, affection, and allowing. Brimming with practical exercises for couples and singles, How to Be an Adult in Relationships offers heartening insights into a lifelong journey of love. Topics include: • Becoming conscious of our relationship patterns and how they relate to childhood • Recognizing and attracting someone who can show adult love • Understanding the phases relationships go through • Creating and maintaining healthy boundaries • Overcoming fears of abandonment and engulfment • Expressing anger and other emotions in adult and loving ways • Surviving break-ups with our self-esteem intact • Understanding love as a spiritual journey

How to Be an Adult

How to Be an Adult
Author: David Richo
Publisher: Paulist Press
Total Pages: 135
Release: 2014-05-14
Genre: Psychology
ISBN: 1616433558

Using the metaphor of the heroic journeydeparture, struggle and returnthe author shows readers the way to psychological and spiritual health.

How to Be an Adult in Love

How to Be an Adult in Love
Author: David Richo
Publisher: Shambhala Publications
Total Pages: 203
Release: 2014-01-07
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 0834828499

We were made to love and be loved. Loving ourselves and others is in our genetic code. It’s nothing other than the purpose of our lives—but knowing that doesn’t make it easy to do. We may find it a challenge to love ourselves. We may have a hard time letting love in from others. We’re often afraid of getting hurt. It is also sometimes scary for us to share love with those around us—and love that isn't shared leaves us feeling flat and unfulfilled. David Richo provides the tools here for learning how to love in evolved adult ways—beginning with getting past the barriers that keep us from loving ourselves, then showing how we can learn to open to love others. He provides wisdom from Buddhism, psychology, and a range of spiritual traditions, along with a wealth of practices both for avoiding the pitfalls that can occur in love relationships and for enhancing the way love shows up in our lives. He then leads us on to love’s inevitable outcome: developing a heart that loves universally and indiscriminately. This transcendent and unconditional love isn’t just for a heroic few, Dave shows, it’s everyone’s magnificent calling.

Daring to Trust

Daring to Trust
Author: David Richo
Publisher: Shambhala Publications
Total Pages: 226
Release: 2011-07-26
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1590309243

The best-selling author of How to Be an Adult in Relationships explains how to build trust—the essential ingredient in successful relationships—in spite of fear or past betrayals Most relationship problems are essentially trust issues, explains psychotherapist David Richo. Whether it’s fear of commitment, insecurity, jealousy, or a tendency to be controlling, the real obstacle is a fundamental lack of trust—both in ourselves and in our partner. Daring to Trust explores the importance of trust throughout our emotional lives: how it develops in childhood and how it becomes an essential ingredient in healthy adult relationships. It offers key insights and practical exercises for exploring and addressing our trust issues in relationships. Topics include: • How we learn early in life to trust others (or not to trust them) • Why we fear trusting • Developing greater trust in ourselves as the basis for trusting others • How to know if someone is trustworthy • Naïve trust vs. healthy, adult trust • What to do when trust is broken Ultimately, Richo explains, we must develop trust in four directions: toward ourselves, toward others, toward life as it is, and toward a higher power or spiritual path. These four types of trust are not only the basis of healthy relationships, they are also the foundation of emotional well-being and freedom from fear.

Attached

Attached
Author: Amir Levine
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 305
Release: 2010-12-30
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1101475161

“Over a decade after its publication, one book on dating has people firmly in its grip.” —The New York Times We already rely on science to tell us what to eat, when to exercise, and how long to sleep. Why not use science to help us improve our relationships? In this revolutionary book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller scientifically explain why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle. Discover how an understanding of adult attachment—the most advanced relationship science in existence today—can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: • Anxious people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back. • Avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. • Secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.

Mindful Loving

Mindful Loving
Author: Henry Grayson
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 308
Release: 2004-03-08
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 9781592400614

In this groundbreaking book, Dr. Henry Grayson shares his breakthrough techniques for creating deeper and more lasting connections with our loved ones. Henry Grayson, a psychologist, relationship counselor, psychoanalyst, and former minister who has been working with couples and individuals to improve their relationships for over thirty years, has found that most people are actually more unhappy after marriage counseling or couples therapy. In Mindful Loving he sets aside the traditional methods of therapy to show you how to look at your relationships from a completely different perspective. By getting to the root of our relationship problems, which stem from our thoughts and beliefs and mistaken ideas about our own identities, Grayson creates a whole new framework—one where psychology, spirituality, and science meet—in which to view intimacy.

Adult Sibling Relationships

Adult Sibling Relationships
Author: Geoffrey L. Greif
Publisher: Columbia University Press
Total Pages: 327
Release: 2015-12-08
Genre: Psychology
ISBN: 0231540809

The bond siblings develop in childhood may be vastly different from the relationship that evolves in adulthood. Driven by affection but also characterized by ambivalence and ambiguity, adult sibling relationships can become hurtful, uncertain, competitive, or exhausting though the undercurrents of love and loyalty remain. An approach that recognizes the positive aspects of the changing sibling relationship, as well as those that need improvement, can restore healthy ties and rebuild family closeness. With in-depth case studies of more than 260 siblings over the age of forty and interviews with experts on mental health and family interaction, this book offers vital direction for traversing the emotional terrain of adult sibling relations. It pursues a richer understanding of ambivalence, a normal though little explored feeling among siblings, and how ambiguity about the past or present can lead to miscommunication and estrangement. For both professionals and general readers, this book clarifies the most confounding elements of sibling relationships and provides specific suggestions for realizing new, productive avenues of friendship in middle and later life—skills that are particularly important for siblings who must cooperate to care for aging parents or give immediate emotional or financial support to other siblings or family members.

Friendkeeping

Friendkeeping
Author: Julie Klam
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 138
Release: 2012-10-25
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1101597011

Look out for Julie's new book, The Almost Legendary Morris Sisters. From the beloved and bestselling memoirist comes a funny and affecting look at making the most of our friendships in an age of isolation. With her inimitable wit and disarming warmth, Julie Klam shares with us her experiences, advice, and insight in Friendkeeping, a candid, hilarious look at some of the most meaningful and enjoyable relationships in our lives: our friendships. After her bestselling You Had Me at Woof, about relationships with dogs, Klam now turns her attention to human relationships to great effect. She examines everything—from the curious world of online friendship to the intersection of friendship and motherhood. She even explores how to hang on to our friendships in the toughest circumstances: when schadenfreude rears its ugly head or when we don’t like our friend’s mate. Klam relays a mix of brand-new and time-tested wisdom—she finds that longtime friends really can grow up without growing apart; that communication is key; that friendship is one of life’s great, free sources of happiness; that you’re not a friend, just a doormat, if you don’t get back what you give—and her discoveries range from amusing to deeply important. Charming, bracingly honest, and compulsively readable, Friendkeeping is an irresistible book, a treat that you’ll want to share with your best friends right away. Brimming with keen observations and laugh-out-loud moments, it’s delivered in the lively, accessible voice that Julie Klam’s readers have come to know and love.

Triggers

Triggers
Author: David Richo
Publisher: Shambhala Publications
Total Pages: 201
Release: 2019-12-10
Genre: Self-Help
ISBN: 0834842580

The author of The Happiness Trap offers a self-help guide full of creative tools for managing triggers and trauma responses—so you can find peace in painful moments and lasting emotional well-being. Psychotherapist David Richo examines the science of triggers and our reactions of fear, anger, and sadness. He helps us understand why our bodies respond before our minds have a chance to make sense of a situation. By looking deeply at the roots of what provokes us—the words, actions, and even sensory elements like smell—we find opportunities to understand the origins of our triggers and train our bodies to remain calm in the face of painful memories. The book offers in-the-moment exercises on how to process difficult emotions and physical manifestations in order to to cultivate the inner resources necessary to deal with recurring memories of trauma. When we are triggered, Richo writes, “we are being bullied by our own unfinished business.” Explore what your body’s knee-jerk reactions can teach you. Triggers: How We Can Stop Reacting and Start Healing acts as a guide to your body's powerful responses, helping you to remain calm under pressure and discover the key to emotional healing.

Is it You, Me, Or Adult A.D.D.?

Is it You, Me, Or Adult A.D.D.?
Author: Gina Pera
Publisher: 1201 Alarm Press
Total Pages: 402
Release: 2008
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 0981548709

Everyone involved with AD/HD will find the information in this book invaluable, especially people with AD/HD and couples therapists, who often mistake AD/HD for communication problems or personality differences. Meticulously researched and presented with empathy and humor, _Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.?_ offers the latest information from top experts, who explain the science and proven protocols for reducing AD/HD's most challenging symptoms. Real-life details come from the partners themselves, who share their stories with touching candor yet plenty of humor.