A Dragon Walks Into a Bar

A Dragon Walks Into a Bar
Author: Jef Aldrich
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 208
Release: 2019-12-03
Genre: Games & Activities
ISBN: 1507212194

This hilarious collection of over 300 puns, one-liners, and classic jokes dedicated to the fun of RPGs is perfect for you share with your fellow gaming compatriots! Why don’t dragons like to eat paladins? They taste lawful. Laugh out loud at over 300 zingy one-liners and eye-rolling puns with this collection of tabletop-based humor, dedicated to the fun of RPGs like Dungeons and Dragons, Pathfinder, and more! A Dragon Walks into a Bar gives you hours of funny content that will keep you smiling. Whether you use them as inspiration for your level 20 comedian bard to crack wise during battle or if you just want a giggle in between turns, this book has everything you’ve been looking for.

Pumpkintown Perils Trilogy

Pumpkintown Perils Trilogy
Author: Aubrey Law
Publisher: Aubrey Law
Total Pages: 315
Release: 2021-04-03
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

Murder, Magic, Mystery, & Myth. Welcome to Pumpkintown. Contains the entire Pumpkintown Perils trilogy (Volumes 1-3) in a convenient series box set! Pumpkintown Perils Volume 1: Terrible Trolls, Naughty Gnomes, & Homicidal Humans Living near a village of gnomes in the enchanted forest called Jagged Wood, Wanda Tempest owns a magic supply shop, practices witchcraft, drinks hard liquor, and does her best to keep peace with the local two-thousand pound Wood Trolls. She also happens to be a promising, if only part-time, Private Investigator. She’s talented, attractive, and has earned the respect and admiration of the equally talented, though far less striking, Pumpkintown Police Inspector Sam Shamrock, a tobacco-tainted, lascivious, and loud-mouthed leprechaun. Sam's crazy about Wanda… she’s crazy about her cat-food-hating whiskered companion, Jinxy. Join this formidable, if mismatched, crime-solving duo, as they tackle mysteries ranging from the suspiciously scandalous to the supernaturally strange. Tormented talking trees, naughty gnomes, terrible trolls, and homicidal humans will keep Wanda and Sam fighting for justice, and their very lives. Pumpkintown Perils Volume 2: Vicious Vampires, Poison Pumpkins, & Wicked Werewolves Vampires in Pumpkintown? Nobody has seen any of the damn bloodsuckers around for nearly a hundred years. But when a gorgeous gnome girl is found dead in a ditch near Nightshade Lake with vampire wounds deep in her neck, Wanda and Sam must discover the truth. It's also time for Pumpkintown's world-famous annual Pumpkin Festival but this year the food has been poisoned and there's also an anonymous assassin determined to kill every last leprechaun alive. As if all that wasn't enough, a mysterious white werewolf was seen stalking the Jagged Wood outside of Wanda's window while the local Wood Trolls are marching for war. There's a big bad moon rising over Pumpkintown and it's up to Wanda, Sam, Amber, Alice, and Jinxy to save the day. Pumpkintown Perils Volume 3: Grungy Goblins, Godlike Giants, & Magic Mushrooms The magical misadventures of wild witch Wanda Tempest and her younger twin sisters along with the legendary leprechaun Pumpkintown Police Inspector Sam Shamrock continue in the third volume of madhouse mysteries. Tenacious trolls, godlike giants, talking trees, and grungy goblins will keep Wanda and her team of crossbow-carrying gnomes busy from dusk until dawn. Volume 3 focuses on the suspenseful story of the wicked Wood Giant Brownbeard and Wanda's midnight to morning journey through the enchanted and jeopardous Jagged Wood. As always, Aunt Hazel and Jinxy make appearances to keep the fun times flowing. New magic, new enemies, and a new exciting experience in the world of Pumpkintown await!

The Birthing House

The Birthing House
Author: Christopher Ransom
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Total Pages: 320
Release: 2009-08-04
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1429984163

It was expecting them. Conrad and Joanna Harrison, a young couple from Los Angeles, attempt to save their marriage by leaving the pressures of the city to start anew in a quiet, rural setting. They buy a Victorian mansion that once served as a haven for unwed mothers, called a birthing house. One day when Joanna is away, the previous owner visits Conrad to bequeath a vital piece of the house's historic heritage, a photo album that he claims "belongs to the house." Thumbing through the old, sepia-colored photographs of midwives and fearful, unhappily pregnant girls in their starched, nineteenth-century dresses, Conrad is suddenly chilled to the bone: staring back at him with a countenance of hatred and rage is the image of his own wife.... Thus begins a story of possession, sexual obsession, and, ultimately, murder, as a centuries-old crime is reenacted in the present, turning Conrad and Joanna's American dream into a relentless nightmare. An extraordinary marriage of supernatural thrills and exquisite psychological suspense, The Birthing House marks the debut of a writer whose first novel is a terrifying tour de force.

Mourning Wood

Mourning Wood
Author: Daniel Paisner
Publisher: Bonus Books, Inc.
Total Pages: 388
Release: 2004
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781566252096

Best-selling author Daniel Paisner makes an indelible impression with a moving and funny novel reminiscent of Carl Hiassen and Peter Lefcourt. From its dramatic and humorous opening to its touching conclusion, Mourning Wood hooks readers with its eccentric characters and offbeat sense of humor.

Into the Woods

Into the Woods
Author: D. L. Mark
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
Total Pages: 385
Release: 2021-01-21
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1800244010

A powerful psychological thriller by the Sunday Times bestselling author of The Guest House. For fans of Alex Michaelides and Ruth Ware. Thirty years ago, three girls followed a stranger into the woods. Only two returned. The surviving pair have never been able to remember what happened or what the fate of the third girl was. Local rumours in the Lake District talk of hippies and drugs and mystic rituals, but no one has learned the truth. This story is just what Rowan Blake needs. He's in debt, his journalistic career is in tatters – as well as his damaged body – and he's retreated to the Lake District to write. Yet even Rowan isn't prepared for the evil he is about to unearth, for the secrets that have been buried in that wood for far too long... Reviewers on D.L. Mark: 'Mark is an extraordinary talent – one of the best in the business. I adore how he writes' M.W. Craven 'Dark, compelling crime writing of the highest order' Daily Mail 'Breathtaking' Peter May 'A wonderfully descriptive writer' Peter James 'Exceptional... Mark is writing at the top of his game' Publishers Weekly 'A master of the dark psychological thriller' Kirkus

Lost Dragoon

Lost Dragoon
Author: Bobbi Kerr
Publisher: Bobbi Kerr
Total Pages: 226
Release: 2023-03-21
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1989569250

I previously published Lost Dragoon under my old name, Bobbi Schemerhorn. Bobbi Kerr is my new name. If you have already purchased it, simply update your reader. But I assure you, I am the same author. Seeking answers from her past, may result in a future Enya doesn’t want. As the secrets of where Enya came from are discovered, they made her feel both a sense of pride and shame. But her search would need to take a back seat to the task ahead of her and her companions. Magic no longer worked, and a violent group of robed strangers were making their way across the land. An enemy all too familiar to Enya and the others. A distant race determined to destroy their world. Will they succeed and stop the robed strangers? How many will die if Enya, Dufin, and Jardeth can’t stop them? In this high fantasy, we continue the exciting journey into Enya’s past and future.

American Slang 4e

American Slang 4e
Author: Barbara Ann Kipfer
Publisher: Harper Collins
Total Pages: 576
Release: 2008-08-19
Genre: Reference
ISBN: 0061179477

With 1,500 new words and phrases, this abridged edition of the Dictionary of American Slang is the most buzzworthy, banging collection of colloquial American English—no joke This fully updated and abridged fourth edition of American Slang contains more than 1,500 new terms representing the variety and vigor of American slang, from "yada yada yada" to "yo momma." There's no better resource for those who are curious about language, fascinated by counterculture, or just completely confused when other people talk. Like previous editions, this edition features pronunciation guides, word origins, examples of appropriate usage as well as a helpful highlighting system that lets you know which terms should be used with caution, and never in polite company. Both an important archive of the way America is really talking and a lot of fun to read, American Slang will prove to be an invaluable companion in keeping up with the dauntingly jargon-filled, quickly evolving language of today.

Bite Marks

Bite Marks
Author: Jennifer Rardin
Publisher: Hachette+ORM
Total Pages: 251
Release: 2009-10-14
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 0316071692

Jaz Parks here. But I'm not alone. I'm hearing voices in my head -- and they're not mine. The problem, or maybe the solution, is work. And the job's a stinker this time -- killing the gnomes that are threatening to topple NASA's Australian-based space complex. Yeah, I know. Vayl and I should still be able to kick this one in our sleep. Except that Hell has thrown up a demon named Kyphas to knock us off track. And damn is she indestructible!

Every Moment After

Every Moment After
Author: Joseph Moldover
Publisher: Clarion Books
Total Pages: 373
Release: 2019
Genre: Juvenile Fiction
ISBN: 1328547272

After high school graduation, best friends Matt and Cole strive to put behind them the school shooting they survived in first grade and really begin to live. Told in two voices.

The Sword and The Storm

The Sword and The Storm
Author: E. E. Storm
Publisher: Page Publishing Inc
Total Pages: 193
Release: 2019-09-25
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1644625814

This is book one of The Trials of Aneria series that follows the adventures of Donn Eledon, a struggling computer retail and repair shop owner, and Cordalea, an Anerian princess. Their fates become entwined as they battle an ancient evil that threatens to cast its shadow throughout the world of Aneria as well as the rest of the universe. One thing though, a dark past will surface. An ancient evil. Wait a sec. I just said that already. A forbidden love. Huh? I thought I only said one thing. Oh yeah, and let's not forget, a stoned and drunken stupor. Well, not entirely in that order and maybe not entirely what I just said. How about you just read my effing book already.