Worst Date Ever

Worst Date Ever
Author: J. S. Cooper
Publisher: J.S. Cooper
Total Pages: 259
Release:
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

“Go on a date,” she said. “You’ll love it,” she said. She was wrong! It had been one year, two months and seventeen days since my last date. So my best friend Abby decided to sign me up for a dating app. She guaranteed that she could get me the best date of my life within one week. I didn’t really want to do it, but I figured what did I have to lose? Turns out that I had: 1. $500 2. My dignity 3. My patience and 4. My innocence to lose OK, so I didn’t really have my innocence to lose, but believe you me, Jack Morrison was my worst date ever. And I’ve been on a lot of bad dates. Trust me when I say that that was the longest ten hours and 33 minutes of my life. I never wanted to see or speak to him again. But it turns out you don’t always get what you want in life, because Jack showed up the very next day at a family gathering I was attending as a fake plus one. As you can imagine that was a real pickle, Jack wanted to know why I went on a date with him when I’m dating someone else. But he can’t know the whole complicated truth of the matter. I’m in a fake relationship and now I’m being blackmailed by the worst date ever. That’s not even the worst part. I decided to log onto this new app called “confession board” to seek some advice, but it turns out Jack Morrison is absolutely everywhere and he’s not going to leave me alone until I submit to his demands.

Confessions of a Failed Grown-Up

Confessions of a Failed Grown-Up
Author: Stephanie Calman
Publisher: Pan Macmillan
Total Pages: 340
Release: 2009-06
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 9780330506632

A brilliant new look for bestselling author Stephanie CalmanIn Confessions of a Bad Mother, Stephanie described how she brought up her children 'wrong'. Now she unlocks her singular inability (but one which secretly we all share) to grow up: forty-five last birthday but she doesn't feel any older, but of course she does - as in deafer, stiffer, and less able to read the dosage instructions on a bottle of Calpol. But the supposedly normal challenges of human existence feel frequently as though they are beyond her. Life is constantly confusing, frustrating and, at times, overwhelming. At forty-five - but only on paper - she's still a child in a suit, bluffing her way with one eye looking over her shoulder, expecting any minute to be found out and taken back to the nursery. Of course, that isn't such a bad place to be. Sometimes she even wants to go back there, but is cruelly aware that she no longer fits the chairs. Also featuring Things to Cook in Stilettos When You're Drunk, Why I am a Time Lord, A Hundred Ways to Wreck an Evening, Ten Things They Don't Tell You in Biology and The Grown-Ups' phrase book, Stephanie Calman's candid, touching and hysterically funny new book gives hope to bad mothers and failed grown-ups everywhere: read it and know that you are not alone.

The Confessions of Max Tivoli

The Confessions of Max Tivoli
Author: Andrew Sean Greer
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Total Pages: 290
Release: 2007-04-01
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 0374706301

From the bestselling and Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Less comes Andrew Sean Greer's extraordinarily haunting love story The Confessions of Max Tivoli, told in the voice of a man who appears to age backwards. A Today Show Book Club Pick We are each the love of someone's life. So begins The Confessions of Max Tivoli, a heartbreaking love story with a narrator like no other. At his birth, Max's father declares him a "nisse," a creature of Danish myth, as his baby son has the external physical appearance of an old, dying creature. Max grows older like any child, but his physical age appears to go backward--on the outside a very old man, but inside still a fearful child. The story is told in three acts. First, young Max falls in love with a neighborhood girl, Alice, who ages as normally as any of us. Max, of course, does not; as a young man, he has an older man's body. But his curse is also his blessing: as he gets older, his body grows younger, so each successive time he finds his Alice, she does not recognize him. She takes him for a stranger, and Max is given another chance at love. Set against the historical backdrop of San Francisco at the turn of the twentieth century, Max's life and confessions question the very nature of time, of appearance and reality, and of love itself. A beautiful and daring feat of the imagination, Andrew Sean Greer's The Confessions of Max Tivoli reveals the world through the eyes of a "monster," a being who confounds the very certainties by which we live and in doing so embodies in extremis what it means to be human.

Confessions of a Carnivore

Confessions of a Carnivore
Author: Diane Lefer
Publisher:
Total Pages: 330
Release: 2015-01-14
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781937677961

After Rae's ear is shot off by a jittery security guard at the health food store, the insurance settlement allows her to take a year off from teaching. She spends it volunteering at the Los Angeles Zoo. These days, except for her best friend Jennie, Rae has little use for human beings. She loves cats-lots of cats. The refugee she cares for, airlifted from Afghanistan to safety, is not a person but a mountain goat. As the US goes to war and baboons fall deeply, tragically, in love, Rae's involvement with Gorilla Theater--street agitators raising awareness of animal rights--leads inexorably to confrontations over human rights. Especially when Jennie is disappeared. Confessions of a Carnivore is an antic romp through a minefield, a novel about animal behavior, endangered species, endangered democracy, and love.

Mary's Monster

Mary's Monster
Author: Lita Judge
Publisher:
Total Pages: 321
Release: 2018-01-30
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
ISBN: 1626725004

A free verse biography of Mary Shelley, the author of Frankenstein, featuring over 300 pages of black-and-white watercolor illustrations.

Confessions of a Dork Lord

Confessions of a Dork Lord
Author: Mike Johnston
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 354
Release: 2020-01-28
Genre: Juvenile Fiction
ISBN: 1524740810

Despicable Me meets Diary of a Wimpy Kid in this hilarious illustrated middle grade adventure that follows a hapless warlock-in-training as he struggles to live up to his great and terrible destiny. Meet Wick. He's the son of the Dark Lord, heir to the throne of black and broken glass, and next in line to be the leader of the Grim World. Too bad he's stuck in Remedial Spell Casting (he can barely even cast the fart-revealer spell), he's allergic to fire and brimstone, and the bullies at school insist on calling him Dork Lord. Full of humor, hijinks, and lively illustrations, Confessions of a Dork Lord follows Wick through the pages of his journal as he comes up with a genius plan to defeat his foes, achieve greatness . . . and survive Middle Ages School. "I loved every page, and your kid will too!" --Melissa de la Cruz, bestselling author of the Descendants series "It's not easy being bad. But this book will give you a head start." --Pseudonymous Bosch, bestselling author of the Secret series "Hilarious! Not to be missed!" --Eoin Colfer, bestselling author of the Artemis Fowl series

Confessions of a Contractor

Confessions of a Contractor
Author: Richard Murphy
Publisher: Putnam Adult
Total Pages: 296
Release: 2008
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

A successful screenwriter and former contractor himself, Murphy pens this sexy, page-turning novel about the combustible mix that results when desire, jealousy, and home renovation collide.

Confessions of an Ex-Secret Service Agent

Confessions of an Ex-Secret Service Agent
Author: George Rush
Publisher:
Total Pages: 308
Release: 1991-11
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
ISBN: 9780671679422

For over a decade, Marty Venker went wherever the President went, his eyes moving all the time, his body bristling with lethal energy and alertness. In this funny, candid behind-the-scenes look at life with some of the world's most powerful men and women--Nixon, Ford, Carter, Imelda Marcos, and others--Venker reveals how the Secret Service scopes out a crowd, and more. Fine.