Breaking the Argument Cycle

Breaking the Argument Cycle
Author: Sharon Rivkin
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
Total Pages: 241
Release: 2009-10-01
Genre: Self-Help
ISBN: 0762758171

Revealing where the real conflict lies in a relationship—and resolving it * Breaking the Argument Cycle is a book for all those who've ever found themselves arguing with their significant other, again and again, about money, sex, or even a seemingly trivial topic—when, at its core, the conflict is about something completely different. A longtime marriage and family therapist, Sharon Rivkin has helped hundreds of couples fix their relationships by understanding why they fight. Here, she shows how anyone can use the tools of therapy to break the cycle of destructive fighting—namely, by resolving the core issues of early arguments, which have their roots in childhood and get repeated over time. Presenting real-life stories and easy exercises, Rivkin sets forth a simple, three-step process—Peel, Reveal, Heal—to empower couples to identify and then resolve their core issues themselves, shedding light on what they're really arguing about. This is then followed up with healing exercises. By thus breaking the argument cycle, confusion and chaos turn into clarity and healing—and everyone can learn how and why they get hooked into an argument, how to unhook, and how to develop lasting tools to turn conflict into intimacy . . . even after years of fighting.

The New Rules of Marriage

The New Rules of Marriage
Author: Terrence Real
Publisher: Ballantine Books
Total Pages: 322
Release: 2007-01-30
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 0345497384

In his extraordinary new book, Terrence Real, distinguished therapist and bestselling author, presents a long overdue message that women need to hear: You aren’t crazy–you’re right! Women have changed in the last twenty-five years–they have become powerful, independent, self-confident, and happy. Yet many men remain irresponsible and emotionally detached. They don’t know how to respond to frustrated partners who just want their mates to show up and grow up. Enter the good news: In this revolutionary book, Real shows women how to master the new rules of twenty-first-century marriage by offering them a set of effective tools with which they can create the truly intimate relationship that they desire and deserve. He identifies five non-starters to avoid and shares practical strategies for bringing honesty, passion, and joy back to even the most difficult relationship. Using his experience helping thousands of couples shift from despair to profound emotional closeness, Real guides you through the process of relationship repair with exercises that you can do alone or with your partner. With this program you’ll discover how to - identify and articulate your wants and needs - listen well and respond generously - set limits, and stand up for yourself - embrace and appreciate what you have - know when to seek outside help The New Rules of Marriage will introduce you to a radically new kind of relationship, one based on the idea that every woman has the power to transform her marriage, while men, given the right support, have it in them to rise to the occasion. We have never wanted so much from our relationships as we do today. More than any other generation, we yearn for our mates to be lifelong friends and lovers. The New Rules of Marriage shows us how to fulfill this courageous and uncompromising new vision.

Stop the Fight!: An Illustrated Guide for Couples: How to Break Free from the 12 Most Common Arguments and Build a Relationship That Lasts

Stop the Fight!: An Illustrated Guide for Couples: How to Break Free from the 12 Most Common Arguments and Build a Relationship That Lasts
Author: Michelle Brody
Publisher: The Experiment, LLC
Total Pages: 330
Release: 2015-10-27
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1615192816

This Illustrated Guide for Couples Ends 12 Hurtful Arguments Once and for All! Conflict within relationships is complex and challenging to overcome. In her 20 years of working with couples, clinical psychologist Michelle Brody found a way to make change simpler. Her secret: clear and lighthearted illustrations that help couples literally see what’s driving their battles and blocking their bond, so they can chart a course together to stop the fights. The Money Fight “You’re such a cheapskate!” “You spend way too much!” The Sex Fight “Not tonight. I’m not in the mood.” “You haven’t been in the mood since 1975!” The Parenting Differences Fight “You’re too overprotective!” “Is skydiving next?!” Stop the Fight! includes more than 300 illustrations to help couples unlock the destructive cycles that drive the birthday fight, the difficult relatives fight, and other familiar battles. Going beyond common relationship advice, the tools in Stop the Fight! will help you understand the big picture and create lifelong change.

Prisoners of Politics

Prisoners of Politics
Author: Rachel Elise Barkow
Publisher: Harvard University Press
Total Pages: 305
Release: 2019-03-04
Genre: Law
ISBN: 0674919238

America’s criminal justice system reflects irrational fears stoked by politicians seeking to win election. Pointing to specific policies that are morally problematic and have failed to end the cycle of recidivism, Rachel Barkow argues that reform guided by evidence, not politics and emotions, will reduce crime and reverse mass incarceration.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
Author: John Gottman, PhD
Publisher: Harmony
Total Pages: 321
Release: 2015-05-05
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 0553447718

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

How To Argue So Your Spouse Will Listen

How To Argue So Your Spouse Will Listen
Author: Sharon May, PHD
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Total Pages: 225
Release: 2007-09-02
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 1418570087

If you are a couple, you've most likely had an argument. Big or small, it can ruin your day and, even worse, your relationship. Dr. Sharon Morris May says, "It's not how similar you are or even your level of conflict that determines your marital success but how you deal with your emotions, vulnerabilities, and dragons when you argue." Dr. Sharon views conflict through the lens of the attachment theory, helping us understand: why we argue, how we argue, and how to unravel our arguments. She helps us identify what's really going on in our brains and body when we argue, the cycles we get stuck in, the emotions fueling the cycles, and then helps us to argue in more considerate and connecting ways. She also offers six practical principles that help turn arguments into conversations: Establish a Safe Haven Comfort Dragons Get Inside Emotions Learn How to Complain Learn How to Apologize Bookend it with Good Times Learning how to argue so your spouse will listen will change your marriage and change your life!

Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated

Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated
Author: Linda W. Rooks
Publisher: New Growth Press
Total Pages: 165
Release: 2019-02-25
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 1948130548

When your marriage falls apart, where can you turn for hope and help? Linda Rooks, an experienced guide for marriages in crisis, provides biblical wisdom, real-life stories, and practical help for husbands and wives who desire restoration in their marriages. Even if your spouse has turned away, there is hope.

Why Does He Do That?

Why Does He Do That?
Author: Lundy Bancroft
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 436
Release: 2003-09-02
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 9780425191651

In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft—a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men—uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued, and to find ways to get free of an abusive relationship. He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You’ve asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men—and change your life. In Why Does He Do That? you will learn about: • The early warning signs of abuse • The nature of abusive thinking • Myths about abusers • Ten abusive personality types • The role of drugs and alcohol • What you can fix, and what you can’t • And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely “This is without a doubt the most informative and useful book yet written on the subject of abusive men. Women who are armed with the insights found in these pages will be on the road to recovering control of their lives.”—Jay G. Silverman, Ph.D., Director, Violence Prevention Programs, Harvard School of Public Health

Teens Who Hurt

Teens Who Hurt
Author: Kenneth V. Hardy
Publisher: Guilford Press
Total Pages: 289
Release: 2006-10-23
Genre: Psychology
ISBN: 1593854404

Offering a fresh perspective on treatment, this book presents an overarching framework and numerous specific strategies for working with violent youth and their families. The authors draw on extensive experience to identify four critical factors that push some adolescents to commit harmful, even deadly acts: devaluation, erosion of community, dehumanized loss, and rage. Effective ways to address each of these factors in clinical and school settings are discussed and illustrated with evocative case material. The book also provides essential guidance on connecting with aggressive teeens--many whom have endured traumas of their owen--managing difficult situations that are likely to arise in therapy.

Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess

Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess
Author: Dr. Caroline Leaf
Publisher: Baker Books
Total Pages: 320
Release: 2021-03-02
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 1493424017

Toxic thoughts, depression, anxiety--our mental mess is frequently aggravated by a chaotic world and sustained by an inability to manage our runaway thoughts. But we shouldn't settle into this mental mess as if it's just our new normal. There's hope and help available to us--and the road to healthier thoughts and peak happiness may actually be shorter than you think. Backed by clinical research and illustrated with compelling case studies, Dr. Caroline Leaf provides a scientifically proven five-step plan to find and eliminate the root of anxiety, depression, and intrusive thoughts in your life so you can experience dramatically improved mental and physical health. In just 21 days, you can start to clean up your mental mess and be on the road to wholeness, peace, and happiness.