The Worst Dead Baby Jokes Of All Time
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Author | : Oliver Gaspirtz |
Publisher | : Westhoff Publishing |
Total Pages | : 114 |
Release | : 2017-03-19 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : |
Are you a self-righteous political correctness crusader? Looking for the next big thing to get all outraged over? Do you plan on being highly offended by this book? Remember, just because you find dead baby jokes insensitive and offensive doesn't mean you have the right to ruin the fun for everyone else. Think of it this way: Just because you have a nut allergy, you don't get to ruin the Peanuts movie for everyone else. These are just jokes. Terribly tasteless jokes. But just jokes nonetheless. You know, Freedom of Speech and what not. No actual babies were harmed during the making of this book. So don't get your politically correct panties in a knot. Relax, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to laugh. I won't tell anybody what a sick puppy you are. It'll be our little secret. It's ok to laugh at terrible jokes. Really. (More about that at the end of this book.) Gaspirtz
Author | : Unearthed Books |
Publisher | : Createspace Independent Pub |
Total Pages | : 178 |
Release | : 2012-08-01 |
Genre | : Cooking |
ISBN | : 9781478313014 |
THE ULTIMATE DEAD BABY COOKBOOK is filled to the gills with all new recipes for 2012 and 2013! Appetizers, Blended Drinks, Breakfast Dishes, Lunch, Entrees and Desserts! With recipes from all over the globe, reaching far off countries like Vietnam and China to our back yard of Britain, Scotland and Ireland! It tells you everything you ever needed to know; to cook and serve a dead baby to your friends and family! Actual recipes, you can really use, even if you?re out of dead baby. Just pick a different meat like puppy or kitten to substitute and viola! Your friends and family will be thrilled to know, you're cooking for them using... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! Let Master Chef: Stephanzoe Orib of the infamous Flower of Flesh and Blood Restaurant in Okinawa Japan, take you on a dead baby, tasting thrill ride of different dead baby cuisine from around the world! The only thing, Master Chef Orib refuses to do, is show you his techniques of sashimi and sushi, using dead and sometimes live, babies. For that, you must visit The Flower of Flesh and Blood in Okinawa, Japan! I guarantee you, the best this world has to offer in fresh succulent baby eating. Everything you ever wondered and needed to know about Dead Babies is answered in this book. This is is the cookbook you need. This is... The Ultimate Dead Baby Cookbook! AWARDS and CONSTESTS WON: Chef of the Year Award: Bangkok Puppy Recipes 2012: Best Use Of Snout And Tales Cat Recipes: Achievement Award: Second Place Hong Kong: Up And Comer Award: Baby and Puppy Division Taiwanese Soup Finally: Best Use Of Garlic, Baby Lotion And Stale Children Award: 1st place Ireland: Worst Use Of Dead Babies and Potatoes: 1st place Great Britain: Worst Use Of Dead Babies in Shepard's Pie: Last Place Great Britain National Cook Off: Best Use of Dead Baby In Kidney Pie: First Place Texas International Chili Cook Off: 3rd Place, For Most Inventive Chili Tokyo's Tasty Fleshy Happy Time Award: 2nd place Matsuda's Funky Tasty Spitty Chewy Award: 1st place Dead Baby Quarterly: Master Chef Award For All Time Greatness
Author | : Simon J. Bronner |
Publisher | : august house |
Total Pages | : 288 |
Release | : 1988 |
Genre | : Juvenile Nonfiction |
ISBN | : 9780874830682 |
Front cover: A book of rhymes, games, jokes, stories, secret languages, beliefs and camp legends, for parents, grandparents, teachers, counselors and all adults who were once children.
Author | : Norm Macdonald |
Publisher | : Random House |
Total Pages | : 245 |
Release | : 2016-09-20 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 0812993632 |
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • “Driving, wild and hilarious” (The Washington Post), here is the incredible “memoir” of the legendary actor, gambler, raconteur, and Saturday Night Live veteran. When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
Author | : Jeff Strand |
Publisher | : Red Room Press |
Total Pages | : 316 |
Release | : 2016-06-01 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : |
"Not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach, the 19 stories in this new best-of annual anthology feature episodes of graphic gore and violence—including torture, dismemberment, self-mutilation, and home abortion—that are designed to push buttons as well as boundaries...strictly for hardcore horror fans."—Publishers Weekly Excerpt from the Introduction: Editors Randy Chandler and Cheryl Mullenax put the call out to horror writers and editors of extreme stories, the hardcore stuff that breaks boundaries and trashes taboos, the transgressive tales you can't "unread" (as Chuck Palahniuk says). We staked out our territory and nailed this to the wall to guide us: YEAR'S BEST HARDEST HORROR Not your mama's best-of horror annual. This stuff comes from the edge of the abyss, stories you read at your own risk because you feel the abyss looking right back into you through the tainted lens of each twisted tale. Some of the stories you'll find here are loaded with very graphic descriptions of violence, sex and depravities, while others may contain only one shocking moment of brutality. In others, the hardcore aspect may be less graphic and subtler than you might expect. Some of these quieter tales offer the reader some time to recover from the more disturbing ones preceding. Most of the stories collected here are from small and specialty press anthologies, with a few from periodicals, like the prestigious Splatterpunk Zine in the UK and Thuglit here in the US. Bizarro is also represented with a couple of tales from the unlikely anthology Blood For You: A Literary Tribute To GG Allin from Weirdpunk Books. (If you're not familiar with the late GG Allin, you can find snippets from some of his outrageous and obscene punk shows online, which will increase your appreciation of those two tales.) So for now, forget about that neighbor you suspect is a serial killer, don't worry about the drunk driver that could take you out on your next trip to the store, push those troubling news stories to the back of your mind and immerse yourself in the imaginary horrors at hand. But don't be surprised if you sense something dark staring back at you from between the lines. That is to be expected when you enter these forbidding realms. With any luck, you may find something useful to help you survive the approaching Apocalypse. TABLE OF CONTENTS Introduction: The Year That Was "Worth the Having" by Michael Paul Gonzalez "Awakening" by Jeff Strand "Readings Off The Charts" by Adam Cesare "Reborn" by The Behrg "What's Worst" by David James Keaton "Dead End" by Kristopher Triana "What You Wish For" by Lilith Morgan "King Shits" by Charles Austin Muir "Cleanup On Aisle 3" by Adam Howe "Bath Salt Fetus" by Jorge Palacios "Bored With Brutality" by MP Johnson "Exposed" by Monica J. O'Rourke "Eleanor" by Jason Parent "The Scavengers" by Tony Knighton "The Most Important Miracle" by Scott Emerson "Hungry For Control" by Clare de Lune "Clarissa" by Robert Essig & Jack Bantry "Where The Sun Don't Shine" by Pete Kahle "Blackbird Lullaby" by George Cotronis
Author | : David Foster Wallace |
Publisher | : Back Bay Books |
Total Pages | : 549 |
Release | : 2009-11-23 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 0316090522 |
These widely acclaimed essays from the author of Infinite Jest -- on television, tennis, cruise ships, and more -- established David Foster Wallace as one of the preeminent essayists of his generation. In this exuberantly praised book -- a collection of seven pieces on subjects ranging from television to tennis, from the Illinois State Fair to the films of David Lynch, from postmodern literary theory to the supposed fun of traveling aboard a Caribbean luxury cruiseliner -- David Foster Wallace brings to nonfiction the same curiosity, hilarity, and exhilarating verbal facility that has delighted readers of his fiction, including the bestselling Infinite Jest.
Author | : Avery Monsen |
Publisher | : Chronicle Books |
Total Pages | : 96 |
Release | : 2013-10-01 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 145213538X |
If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life while exploring each cartoon character's unique grievance and wide-eyed predicament. From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable.
Author | : |
Publisher | : Ulysses Press |
Total Pages | : 146 |
Release | : 2009-07-14 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 1569757097 |
A treasury of irreverent, politically incorrect, and wholly distasteful jokes represents top-selected submissions to the b3ta.com Web site, in a volume that is complemented by equally biting illustrations. Original.
Author | : Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie |
Publisher | : Knopf |
Total Pages | : 44 |
Release | : 2021-05-11 |
Genre | : Biography & Autobiography |
ISBN | : 0593320816 |
From the globally acclaimed, best-selling novelist and author of We Should All Be Feminists, a timely and deeply personal account of the loss of her father: “With raw eloquence, Notes on Grief … captures the bewildering messiness of loss in a society that requires serenity, when you’d rather just scream. Grief is impolite ... Adichie’s words put welcome, authentic voice to this most universal of emotions, which is also one of the most universally avoided” (The Washington Post). Notes on Grief is an exquisite work of meditation, remembrance, and hope, written in the wake of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's beloved father’s death in the summer of 2020. As the COVID-19 pandemic raged around the world, and kept Adichie and her family members separated from one another, her father succumbed unexpectedly to complications of kidney failure. Expanding on her original New Yorker piece, Adichie shares how this loss shook her to her core. She writes about being one of the millions of people grieving this year; about the familial and cultural dimensions of grief and also about the loneliness and anger that are unavoidable in it. With signature precision of language, and glittering, devastating detail on the page—and never without touches of rich, honest humor—Adichie weaves together her own experience of her father’s death with threads of his life story, from his remarkable survival during the Biafran war, through a long career as a statistics professor, into the days of the pandemic in which he’d stay connected with his children and grandchildren over video chat from the family home in Abba, Nigeria. In the compact format of We Should All Be Feminists and Dear Ijeawele, Adichie delivers a gem of a book—a book that fundamentally connects us to one another as it probes one of the most universal human experiences. Notes on Grief is a book for this moment—a work readers will treasure and share now more than ever—and yet will prove durable and timeless, an indispensable addition to Adichie's canon.
Author | : Gyles Brandreth |
Publisher | : Penguin UK |
Total Pages | : 199 |
Release | : 2020-08-20 |
Genre | : Juvenile Nonfiction |
ISBN | : 0241427304 |
Laugh yourself silly in this fantastic collection of jokes and riddles! WHAT'S BLACK AND WHITE AND RED ALL OVER? An embarrassed Penguin A sunburnt elephant A newspaper! Did those jokes make you laugh? Make you groan? Maybe a bit of both? There's a lot more where they came from. Collected here by jokesmith Gyles Brandreth are some of the best and worst jokes ever (plus a few riddles to keep you on your toes). From 'Knock, knock' to 'Waiter waiter', with some funny elephants and giraffes thrown in for good measure, there's also a bit of expert joke advice, so you can show others just how funny you can be! 'Very funny, and often outright silly' Guardian on Have You Eaten Grandma by Gyles Brandreth