The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island

The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island
Author: Cameron Pierce
Publisher:
Total Pages: 0
Release: 2010-07
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781936383085

A demented fairy tale about a pickle, a pancake, and the apocalypse. It is Gaston Glew's sixteenth Sad Day - the sixteenth anniversary of the saddest day of his life: his day of birth - and his parents have just committed suicide. Fed up with the sadness of Pickled Planet, Gaston Glew builds a rocket ship and blasts off into outer space, hoping to escape his briny fate. Meanwhile, on Pancake Island, Fanny Fod, the most beautiful pancake girl in the world, nurses a secret sadness as she guards the origin of all happiness: the mysterious Cuddlywumpus. When Gaston's rocket ship crash-lands in the sea of maple syrup that surrounds Pancake Island, nothing will ever be the same for him, or for Fanny Fod. Captain Pickle says: "Unchain yourself from this briny fate, oh pickled prisoner, and read Cameron Pierce's The Pickled Apocalypse of Pancake Island: A Tragedy for People Who Eat Food!"

The Ice Cream Man and Other Stories

The Ice Cream Man and Other Stories
Author: Sam Pink
Publisher: Catapult
Total Pages: 289
Release: 2020-03-03
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1593765932

“Pink is a keen observer of the culture of minimum-wage jobs and low-rent studio apartments that is the reality of life for all those who don't find a cog space in today’s hyper-capitalist economy.” —The Guardian Cone dealer, sunshine stealer, alleyway counselor, lunch lady to the homeless, friend to the dead, maker of sandwiches. Metal wrangler. Stag among stags. And so it goes—another journey through time spent punched in. A life's work of working for a living. Blood, death, and violence. Dirty dishes, dead roaches, and sparkler-lit nights. Nights ahead and no real fate. So open your mouths because the forecast calls for sprinkles. Thirteen delights, scooped and served. Let it melt down your hand. Let the sun burn your face. It's the ice cream man, and other stories.

Amazing Stories of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Amazing Stories of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
Author: Cameron Pierce
Publisher:
Total Pages: 0
Release: 2011-10
Genre: Humor
ISBN: 9781936383979

On the seventh day, the Flying Spaghetti Monster said, "Read me, for I am good." In Amazing Stories, the Flying Spaghetti Monster goes on trial to earn his godhood among a council of deities that includes Jehovah, the Buddha, Ganesh, Cthulhu, and Charlie Sheen. He is interviewed for an exclusive episode of the celebrity talk show In the Monster's Studio to discuss his relationship with Godzilla and other famous monsters. He rears his head at an archeological dig in a desert wasteland and dines with a horde of food demons in Hell. He rescues pirates, authors, and prisoners from the cold hand of death while banishing children to suffering and starvation. He is a just god, but only if you compliment his vodka sauce. Like an all-spaghetti evening of Adult Swim, Amazing Stories of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will show you the many realms of His Noodly Appendage. Learn of those who worship him and the lives he touches in distant, mysterious ways. Enjoy with Italian food and a side of Darwinism.

The Art of Eating Through the Zombie Apocalypse

The Art of Eating Through the Zombie Apocalypse
Author: Lauren Wilson
Publisher: BenBella Books, Inc.
Total Pages: 362
Release: 2014-10-28
Genre: Crafts & Hobbies
ISBN: 1940363373

Just because the undead's taste buds are atrophying doesn't mean yours have to! You duck into the safest-looking abandoned house you can find and hold your breath as you listen for the approaching zombie horde you've been running from all day. You hear a gurgling sound. Is it the undead? No—it's your stomach. When the zombie apocalypse tears down life and society as we know it, it will mean no more take out, no more brightly lit, immaculately organized aisles of food just waiting to be plucked effortlessly off the shelves. No more trips down to the local farmers' market. No more microwaved meals in front of the TV or intimate dinner parties. No, when the undead rise, eating will be hard, and doing it successfully will become an art. The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse is a cookbook and culinary field guide for the busy zpoc survivor. With more than 80 recipes (from Overnight of the Living Dead French Toast and It's Not Easy Growing Greens Salad to Down & Out Sauerkraut, Honey & Blackberry Mead, and Twinkie Trifle), scads of gastronomic survival tips, and dozens of diagrams and illustrations that help you scavenge, forage, and improvise your way to an artful post-apocalypse meal. The Art of Eating is the ideal handbook for efficient food sourcing and inventive meal preparation in the event of an undead uprising. Whether you decide to hole up in your own home or bug out into the wilderness, whether you prefer to scavenge the dregs of society or try your hand at apocalyptic agriculture, and regardless of your level of skill or preparation, The Art of Eating will help you navigate the wasteland and make the most of what you eat.

Ass Goblins of Auschwitz

Ass Goblins of Auschwitz
Author: Cameron Pierce
Publisher:
Total Pages: 0
Release: 2009-10
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781933929934

It's Monty Python meets Nazi exploitation in a surreal nightmare as can only be imagined by Bizarro author Cameron Pierce. In a land where black snow falls in the shape of swastikas, there exists a nightmarish prison camp known as Auschwitz. It is run by a fascist, flatulent race of aliens called the Ass Goblins, who travel in apple-shaped spaceships to abduct children from the neighboring world of Kidland. Prisoners 999 and 1001 are conjoined twin brothers forced to endure the sadistic tortures of these ass-shaped monsters. To survive, they must eat kid skin and work all day constructing bicycles and sex dolls out of dead children. While the Ass Goblins become drunk on cider made from fermented children, the twins plot their escape. But it won't be easy. They must overcome toilet toads, cockrats, ass dolls, and the surgical experiments that are slowly mutating them into goblin-child hybrids. Forget everything you know about Auschwitz...you're about to be Shit Slaughtered.

Lost in Cat Brain Land

Lost in Cat Brain Land
Author: Cameron Pierce
Publisher:
Total Pages: 152
Release: 2010-06
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781936383047

Sad stories from a surreal world. A fascist mustache. A desert inside a dead cat. The ghost of Franz Kafka. Primordial entities mourn the death of their child. The desperate serve tea to mysterious creatures. A hopeless romantic falls in love with a pterodactyl. From a post-apocalyptic Los Angeles where robotic gargoyles are law, to a blighted suburbia where the elephant god Ganesh seeks revenge on a man and his android wife, Cat Brain Land is a place of domestic despair and nightmare foreboding. Where sirloin steaks enroll in daycare and ex-lovers return as tiny dolls. This is a land of camel people and the Lord of Meat. The farther into Cat Brain Land you get, the more difficult it will be to get out.

The Cookie Dough Lover's Cookbook

The Cookie Dough Lover's Cookbook
Author: Lindsay Landis
Publisher: Quirk Books
Total Pages: 161
Release: 2013-07-09
Genre: Cooking
ISBN: 159474694X

A delightful recipe collection of raw cookie dough confections, this is the perfect whimsical treat to “tempt your inner child,” and “highly recommended” for dessert lovers everywhere (Library Journal) Food blogger Lindsay Landis has invented the perfect cookie dough. It tastes great. It’s egg free (and thus safe to eat raw). You can whip it up in minutes. And, best of all, you can use it to make dozens of delicious cookie dough creations, from cakes, custards, and pies to candies, brownies, and even granola bars. Included are recipes for indulgent breakfasts (cookie dough doughnuts!), frozen treats (cookie dough popsicles!), outrageous snacks (cookie dough wontons! cookie dough fudge! cookie dough pizza!), and more. The Cookie Dough Lover’s Cookbook features clear instructions and dozens of decadent full-color photographs. If you’ve ever been caught with a finger in the mixing bowl, then this is the book for you!

The Emperor's Pearl

The Emperor's Pearl
Author: Robert van Gulik
Publisher: University of Chicago Press
Total Pages: 193
Release: 2010-10-15
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 0226849074

It all begins on the night of the Poo-yang dragonboat races in 699 A.D.: a drummer in the leading boat collapses, and the body of a beautiful young woman turns up in a deserted country mansion. There, Judge Dee—tribunal magistrate, inquisitor, and public avenger—steps in to investigate the murders and return order to the Tang Dynasty. In The Emperor’s Pearl, the judge discovers that these two deaths are connected by an ancient tragedy involving a near-legendary treasure stolen from the Imperial Harem one hundred years earlier. The terrifying figure of the White Lady, a river goddess enshrined on a bloodstained altar, looms in the background of the investigation. Clues are few and elusive, but under the expert hand of Robert van Gulik, this mythic jigsaw puzzle assembles itself into a taut mystery. “If you have not yet discovered Judge Dee and his faithful Sgt. Hoong, I envy you that initial pleasure which comes from the discovery of a great detective story. For the magistrate of Poo-yang belongs in that select group of fictional detectives headed by the renowned Sherlock Holmes.”—Robert Kirsch, Los AngelesTimes “The title of this book and the book itself have much in common. Each is a jewel, a rare and precious find.”—AtlantaTimes

The Walking Dead: The Official Cookbook and Survival Guide

The Walking Dead: The Official Cookbook and Survival Guide
Author: Lauren Wilson
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 152
Release: 2017-10-10
Genre: Cooking
ISBN: 1683831799

Based on AMC’s hit series, this post-apocalyptic cookbook features tips on hunting and foraging plus recipes inspired by or featured on the show. The Walking Dead: The Official Cookbook and Survival Guide details the skills and recipes you need to eat—while avoiding being eaten—should you find yourself caught in a walker apocalypse. The book features recipes for meals featured on the show, plus food and drinks inspired by key characters and locations. It also shares expert information on foraging, hunting wild game, food preservation, and outdoor cooking. Featuring familiar treats like Carl’s pudding, Carol Peletier’s baked goods, and Hershel’s spaghetti, this is the ultimate gift for fans and walker-wary survivalists alike.

Love in the Time of Dinosaurs

Love in the Time of Dinosaurs
Author: Kirsten Alene
Publisher:
Total Pages: 96
Release: 2010-10
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781936383245

DINOSAURS! LOVE! WAR! MONASTIC LIVING! Three days after his partner is bitten in half by a brachiosaur, a nameless monk meets the love of his life. Her name is Petunia. She is a dinosaur. But a twenty-year war between their species is about to come to a head, and only one will survive. To be together, the monk and the dinosaur must fight their way through hordes of pterodactyl samurai, anti-aircraft stegosaurs, gigantic kamikaze moths, and machine gun-wielding tyrannosaurs. Love in the Time of Dinosaurs is a surreal war tale of forbidden love, betrayal, and magic kung-fu. Forget Jurassic Park, this is the greatest dinosaur story ever told.