The Human Santapede

The Human Santapede
Author: Millard
Publisher:
Total Pages: 0
Release: 2023-12-20
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9781738476404

Santa Claus is coming to town...at least, that was the plan, but now his elves have started going missing, kidnapped by some insidious figure in a black cloak, and despite the magic swirling about the place, the toys aren't going to put themselves together. So begins a terrifying game of cat and mouse as Kris Kringle searches The Land of Christmas for his abducted minions, unaware that he is to play an integral part in his foe's plans. Krampus is pissed at Santa after lending him his snowblower and never getting it back. His punishment? To build a Human Santapede long enough to stretch around The Land of Christmas, and at its helm, the jolly fat man himself. Can Santa - aided by his best foreman, Finklefoot - get his elves back, defeat Krampus, and save Christmas before it is too late, or will Krampus succeed in creating the ghastliest single-file organism the North Pole has ever seen? Ho-Ho-Holy Shit, things are about to get messy..

Empress Theresa

Empress Theresa
Author: Norman Boutin
Publisher:
Total Pages: 468
Release: 2019-06-19
Genre:
ISBN: 9781097637454

[ SALES TO DATE: 1,144 ] ........... "Staying alive for me is like surviving a train wreck" ☹️ says nineteen year old Theresa in chapter 22..... "This is the most stupid thing ever done. 🤬 I'm glad I won't be here to see what happens" says eighteen year old Theresa in chapter 4 when she thinks the U.S. government will execute her in a few minutes.......The intellect and the emotions are in constant struggle 👺 for control of the person. In Theresa's case, the intellect wins. 😁 ..... ( IT'S INTERESTING THAT OUT OF THE FIRST -*NINETY-FIVE*- ..YES 95 !!!.., ONE-STAR REVIEWERS, ONLY -*ELEVEN*- ACTUALLY READ THE BOOK AS INDICATED BY AMAZON'S ' Verified Purchase' FLAG. WHY ARE THEY HERE? READ ON. ).......Theresa is a star baseball pitcher in high school. Internet trolls viciously attack her on the internet. A teacher tells Theresa why they do that, and she understands.............. "I saw why the trolls were angry. They knew they couldn't go where I was going. I'd have a good life. They wouldn't.".........If I had intended to write a story that the internet trolls would hate, I couldn't have done better than Empress Theresa. It's a natural internet troll target...........How many stories can make you feel good? Can you think of any? Add Empress Theresa to the list...................In chapter 1, ten year old Theresa admits she doesn't have a clue about anything, but nine years later she confidently says, "I can do anything". "How did I come so far?" she asks herself, and considers a list of influences on her life. She had good parents and family support, she had natural gifts of beauty and intelligence, she has a good, loyal husband, but the most important influence are her own actions. ... "I'm very simple. I follow my conscience. I am what I do." ........What's in Empress Theresa?....... Violence, shootings, bombings? No. Foul language? No. Car chases? No. Sex scenes? No. Marital infidelity? No. Suicide? No. Drugs, alcohol? No. Mystery, crime? No. ........Mysterious events? Yes. "Impossible problems" solved? Yes. Stupid, greedy adversaries? Yes. Teenage ingenuity? Yes. Love and friendship? Yes. Pet chipmunks? Yes. Courage? Yes. Heroism? Yes. Fame and fortune? Yes. U.S. President, British Prime Minister, Israeli Prime Minister? Yes. Global crises? Yes. Political situations? Yes. Philosophical remarks? Yes. Heartwarming scenes? Yes........Can a teenage girl be trusted with limitless power? We'll see.............Of what is Theresa the empress? She's empress of her internal self, described by Henry David Thoreau as 'a realm besides which the empire of the Czar is a petty state', a land too vast to be explored in a lifetime. Theresa rules her inner self.....A teenage Catholic girl from Massachusetts acquires limitless power over the whole world...What will she do with it?....What would you do with it?....On page two, Theresa sums up the human situation in a single sentence: "We're lost in this confusing world unless we follow the directions of its Maker." Theresa figures it all out and changes the world. 😀❤️ 🙋♀

The Between

The Between
Author: Ryan Leslie
Publisher: The Parliament House
Total Pages: 394
Release: 2021-06-22
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1953539823

"I found The Between dark, super creepy, and pushing the limits of my limited amounts of courage to explore—but I couldn’t stop myself from coming back for more because it’s propulsive, addictive, and scary good fun." - Sean Gibson, author of The Part About the Dragon Was (Mostly) True While landscaping his backyard, ever-conscientious Paul Prentice discovers an iron door buried in the soil. His childhood friend and perpetual source of mischief, Jay Lightsey, pushes them to explore what's beneath. When the door slams shut above them, Paul and Jay are trapped in a between-worlds place of Escher-like rooms and horror story monsters, all with a mysterious connection to a command-line, dungeon explorer computer game from the early '80s called The Between. Unlike their childhood gaming, these men are facing life-and-death challenges; tensions rise between Jay and Paul as they encounter stranger things in each room, and their experience in arcade games and role-playing aren't enough to keep their partnership intact. Paul and Jay find themselves filling roles in a story that seems to play out over and over again. But in this world, where their roles warp their minds, the biggest threat to survival may not be the legendary monster Koŝmaro, risen from the Between's depths to hunt them; the biggest danger may be each other. hr Fans of The Goonies, Stranger Things, The Last Starfighter and Ready, Player One will thrill at the horror, adventure and humor that await them in The Between. hr "While in the first third of this book, I mentioned that the atmosphere reminded me of one of my favorite horror novels, SL Grey's The Mall. There's a surreal, not-right quality to that book that touched off a nerve in me that I just adored....I don't at all mean this as an insult, as that's a damn fun book- and so is this one! ....It's almost like a grown up, more gory and violent horror version of Heir Apparent." – Alexandra, Goodreads "This debut novel by author Ryan Leslie combines elements of science fiction and horror that at times reminded me of The Hike by Drew Magary and Off To Be The Wizard by Scott Meyer, all while being something distinctly different." – Matt, Goodreads “It was a great mix of horror, sci-fi and adventure gaming!” – Stephanie, Goodreads

Try the New Candy

Try the New Candy
Author: Aron Beauregard
Publisher:
Total Pages: 257
Release: 2019-05-09
Genre:
ISBN: 9781097620302

A book may seem like a rather harmless form of escape or entertainment but fair warning, this volume holds a breed of abhorrence most would prefer to escape FROM. The repulsive revelations of a disturbed mind. Ten tales of torment portraying the ghastly and macabre. Outlining the lives of individuals that any sane soul would pray to never encounter, in reality or otherwise. Prepare yourself for a vile massacre that puts you so close to the carnage, you'll feel the splatter...Here's a little taste of what to expect: An imbecilic man is taken advantage of for decades before finally considering a sweet revenge. A single, soon to be mother experiences a bizarre sequence of events triggered from her artificial insemination. A budding teenager comes along to house sit with his poor excuse for a father, only to find out the house has some disturbing secrets. A newly married couple enjoys testing the limits of extreme and gets access to a special museum exhibit that is not quite finished. Two girls head out to the club to celebrate a 21st birthday, only to encounter some nightlife they couldn't have imagined.Your misery awaits..

The Susceptibles

The Susceptibles
Author: Adam Millard
Publisher:
Total Pages: 178
Release: 2012-03
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9780957103375

A packed theatre, a rock concert, a surgery room, half a city suddenly fall unconscious with no explanation. When the afflcited regain consciousness, they are suddenly aware of things that had always been hidden, visions that most of them would rather not see. A ballerina is confronted by the ghost of her father... A rock-guitarist starts to realise that his son's nursery is not the haven it once was... An alcoholic surgeon's nightmares finally come true... Pray to God that you're not one of the unfortunates. One of The Susceptibles.

The Bad Game

The Bad Game
Author: Adam Millard
Publisher:
Total Pages: 242
Release: 2016-05-02
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9780993592614

In a thriving seaside town the local children become the perpetrators of uncharacteristic and brutal violence after playing a mysterious new game at the beach-front arcade. Disillusioned teenager Jamie Garrett soon realises that it is a side-effect of the game, and sets out to pull the plug on the machine before it is too late.

Fool Moon

Fool Moon
Author: Jim Butcher
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 432
Release: 2001-01-01
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1440631697

“One of the most enjoyable marriages of the fantasy and mystery genres on the shelves,”(Cinescape) the Dresden Files have become synonymous with action-packed urban fantasy and nonstop fun. Fool Moon continues the adventures of Jim Butcher’s most famous—and infamous—reluctant hero… You’d think there’d be a little more action for the only professional wizard listed in the Chicago phone book. But lately, Harry Dresden hasn’t been able to dredge up any kind of work: magical, mundane, or menial. Just when it looks like he can’t afford his next meal, a murder comes along that requires his particular brand of supernatural expertise. There’s a brutally mutilated corpse, and monstrous animal markings at the scene. Not to mention that the killing took place on the night of a full moon. Harry knows exactly where this case is headed. Take three guesses—and the first two don’t count...

Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits

Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits
Author: Jason Pargin
Publisher: Macmillan
Total Pages: 383
Release: 2015-10-06
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1466835435

New York Times bestselling author Jason Pargin takes readers to a whole new level with his darkly comic sci-fi thriller, Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits. An Alex Award Winner Nightmarish villains with superhuman enhancements. An all-seeing social network that tracks your every move. Mysterious, smooth-talking power players who lurk behind the scenes. A young woman from the trailer park. And her very smelly cat. Together, they will decide the future of mankind. Get ready for a world in which anyone can have the powers of a god or the fame of a pop star, in which human achievement soars to new heights while its depravity plunges to the blackest depths. A world in which at least one cat smells like a seafood shop's dumpster on a hot summer day. This is the world in which Zoey Ashe finds herself, navigating a futuristic city in which one can find elements of the fantastic, nightmarish and ridiculous on any street corner. Her only trusted advisor is the aforementioned cat, but even in the future, cats cannot give advice. At least not any that you'd want to follow. Will Zoey figure it all out in time? Or maybe the better question is, will you? After all, the future is coming sooner than you think.