The Government Manual For New Wizards
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Author | : Matthew David Brozik |
Publisher | : Andrews McMeel Publishing |
Total Pages | : 196 |
Release | : 2009-01-01 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 0740789120 |
The comedic duo behind The Government Manual for New Superheroes is back, and this time they've brought their magic wands and enchanted artifacts. The Government Manual for New Wizards is a hilarious, mock-official handbook for wannabe witches and warlocks who need advice on recognizing the onset of wizardolescence, understanding the laws of magic (and the magic of laws), choosing (or being chosen by) the right magical items and enchanted artifacts, dealing with the dead (grateful and otherwise), successfully hosting magical exhibitions, and the proper care and feeding of magical creatures. Wands, charms, cloaks of invisibility, shoes of stealth (or sneakers), and other otherworldly accoutrements--it's all here, discussed tongue-in-cheek but with the utmost Governmental authority. This entertaining guide offers such sage advice as: * A demon is just as afraid of you as you are of it--provided, of course, that you are eight feet tall, composed of living fire, and capable of destroying a small village with a single angry thought. Otherwise, it doesn't find you frightening at all. * When selecting educational programs, do not be tempted by solicitations from wizardry parchment mills. A so-called degree from such a place is not worth the scroll on which it appears to be inscribed. The ink will disappear not long after the school itself does. The Government Manual for New Wizards is a sidesplitting spoof of all things wizard-y.
Author | : Matthew David Brozik |
Publisher | : Andrews McMeel Publishing |
Total Pages | : 161 |
Release | : 2009-01-01 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 0740789090 |
The government provides manuals for new home-owners and new motor vehicle operators, but what's a new superhero to do? Ka-POW! The Government Manual for New Superheroes rushes in to save the day! The Government Manual for New Superheroes is a hilarious, mock-official handbook that offers thorough, accessible, and completely zany advice for anyone who has always dreamed of donning a skintight spandex uniform and leaping across the rooftops of their cities. Going well beyond tights and capes, this manual provides insight into choosing a name, constructing a costume, choosing the right supertools of the supertrade, establishing a base of operations, maintaining a secret identity, taking or becoming a sidekick, joining a superheroic team, and even finding that special someone who gives meaning to a superhero's life--a nemesis. Extra features include a roster of superhero unions, a registration application, several useful charts and tips, and even a list of other government-sponsored periodicals for further reading. Destined to become a cult classic, The Government Manual for New Superheroes is an essential guide for every aspiring superhero.
Author | : Matthew David Brozik |
Publisher | : Andrews McMeel Publishing |
Total Pages | : 144 |
Release | : 2009-01-01 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 0740789236 |
There be no callin' 'dibs' in piratin'. Booty be divided among the crew, from the lowest deckswabber to the highest masthand. So says the Pirate Code." --Calico Jack Rackham, king of the pirates * Enjoy a witty mock-official handbook for potential pirates and plunderers. Matthew David Brozik and Jacob Sager Weinstein continue to spoof those uber-utilitarian survival and how-to guides by offering this pithy pirating primer for budding buccaneers. This treasure trove of Pirate Code imparts wisdom on eye patches and tricorner hats, talking the talk, walking the walk (down the plank, that is), appropriate ship names, dueling, avoiding cursed treasure, and much more.
Author | : Erin Anne Pyne |
Publisher | : What The Flux Comics Publis |
Total Pages | : 329 |
Release | : 2010 |
Genre | : Fans (Persons) |
ISBN | : 1450745601 |
Author | : Jacob Sager Weinstein |
Publisher | : Andrews McMeel Publishing |
Total Pages | : 137 |
Release | : 2012-03-20 |
Genre | : Family & Relationships |
ISBN | : 1449409911 |
This tongue-in-cheek parenting book is a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual parents have ever cringed over.
Author | : |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : 112 |
Release | : 1997-11-10 |
Genre | : |
ISBN | : |
For more than 40 years, Computerworld has been the leading source of technology news and information for IT influencers worldwide. Computerworld's award-winning Web site (Computerworld.com), twice-monthly publication, focused conference series and custom research form the hub of the world's largest global IT media network.
Author | : |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : 984 |
Release | : 2006 |
Genre | : American literature |
ISBN | : |
Author | : Susan J. Slaughter |
Publisher | : SAS Institute |
Total Pages | : 330 |
Release | : 2017-03-22 |
Genre | : Computers |
ISBN | : 1629608882 |
Learning to use SAS Enterprise Guide has never been easier! Whether you are using SAS Enterprise Guide for the first time, or are looking to expand your skills, this is the book for you! With The Little SAS Enterprise Guide Book, award-winning authors Susan Slaughter and Lora Delwiche help you quickly become productive in the SAS Enterprise Guide point-and-click environment. A series of carefully designed tutorials help you master the basics of the tasks you'll want to do most frequently. The reference section of the book expands on the tutorial topics, covering specific features in more depth. This edition has been completely rewritten, and updated with new features in SAS Enterprise Guide.
Author | : M. M. Kaye |
Publisher | : Penguin |
Total Pages | : 93 |
Release | : 2002-03-18 |
Genre | : Juvenile Fiction |
ISBN | : 110114257X |
Along with Wit, Charm, Health, and Courage, Princess Amy of Phantasmorania receives a special fairy christening gift: Ordinariness. Unlike her six beautiful sisters, she has brown hair and freckles, and would rather have adventures than play the harp, embroider tapestries . . . or become a Queen. When her royal parents try to marry her off, Amy runs away and, because she's so ordinary, easily becomes the fourteenth assistant kitchen maid at a neighboring palace. And there . . . much to everyone's surprise . . . she meets a prince just as ordinary (and special) as she is! "This delightful fairy tale is sure to please young romantics . . . Neither Kaye's princess nor her book should be considered ordinary." (School Library Journal)
Author | : Thane Josef Messinger |
Publisher | : Fine Print Press, Limited |
Total Pages | : 0 |
Release | : 2000 |
Genre | : Law firms |
ISBN | : 9781888960198 |
Who can forget the terror of a new job? Entering an unfamiliar world, with unknown expectations, is a nerve-wracking experience. In law, the new attorney is tackling not only a new job but also a very new, very different, and exceptionally stress-filled professional life...and mountains of student debt. Each year, tens of thousands of new law graduates enter an already saturated job market...yet many are ill-prepared for survival in an ever more unforgiving, fast-paced profession. As law students, you're offered a wide array of guidebooks to succeed in law school, to excel in law exams, and to pass the bar exam. Upon entering the real world of law, however, you're are pushed back into a dark, dangerous jungle. The Young Lawyer's Jungle Book will be your guide to help you find your way to safety and career success.