Three problems in the life of the church: (1) For the past millennium, theologians have done a brisk trade in proofs, arguments for the so-called ‘‘existence’’ of God, the validity of the Christian faith, and so on. I think this is a mistake; Christianity is a choice. (2) Typical Christian theology begins with Jesus rather than with the Common Documents, the documents shared in common by Christianity and rabbinic Judaism. This is Marcionite Theology, so called for a second-century figure who wanted to delete the Common Documents from the Bible. Many problems in theology become much more tractable if the Common Documents, the Exodus focally, are treated as a model rather than as a mere prologue to the New Testament. (3) There are problems with God interfering with nature, and they have become worse with modern science. God interfering with nature doesn’t just injure the sciences, it also generates serious pathologies in theology. The theme is choices made by the church, and the book is called The Accountant’s Tale because somebody once asked an accountant, ‘‘What is two times two?’’ and got the answer, ‘‘What do you want it to be?’’