Last Round-Up of the Guacamole Queens

Last Round-Up of the Guacamole Queens
Author: Jessie Jones
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service, Inc.
Total Pages: 58
Release: 2015-01-01
Genre: Drama
ISBN: 0822232367

THE STORY: In this deliciously funny Southern-fried comedy, the Verdeen cousins of Sweetgum, Texas — Gaynelle, Peaches, and Jimmie Wyvette — are up against the clock as they frantically attempt to produce the ultimate high school reunion before the old building is demolished. But they’ve got a bushel of obstacles to overcome before they can pull off this miracle: Gaynelle is reeling from the humiliating demise of her loathed ex-husband; Peaches’ romantic life has tanked because the older her dates get, the more horrified they are by her job as a mortuarial cosmetologist; and Jimmie Wyvette is trying to live down her on-camera catfight with a local televangelist. To top it all off, the cousins have got to impress a governor’s aide with their party-planning capabilities, so that they can nab the plum job of throwing the governor’s birthday bash — and keep their business afloat. Their scramble to prepare the perfect event is interrupted by the exploits of their beloved Uncle Aubrey, who is in danger of getting throttled by the two octogenarian sisters he’s simultaneously romancing, and by threats from their self-righteous Aunt LaMerle, who is determined to be crowned the final and forever Guacamole Queen of Sweetgum High. And that’s before one of Peaches’ former classmates arrives with a malevolent hand puppet and a score to settle, Jimmie Wyvette hog-ties the sherrif with police tape, the high school gym is blown away, and the desperate battle for Guacamole Queen heats up into an outrageous fight to the finish. Chaos is side-splittingly achieved! A gut-busting Jones Hope Wooten farce — and a stand-alone play in its own right — LAST ROUND-UP OF THE GUACAMOLE QUEENS is the third and final comedy in the Verdeen Cousins Texas Trilogy that begins with THE RED VELVET CAKE WAR and continues with REX’S EXES. You’ll laugh so hard you might even consider attending your next high school reunion!

The Red Velvet Cake War

The Red Velvet Cake War
Author: Jessie Jones
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service Inc
Total Pages: 68
Release: 2019-12-17
Genre: Performing Arts
ISBN: 9780822224822

THE STORY: In this riotously funny Southern-fried comedy, the three Verdeen cousins--Gaynelle, Peaches and Jimmie Wyvette--could not have picked a worse time to throw their family reunion. Their outrageous antics have delighted local gossips in the s

Rex's Exes

Rex's Exes
Author: Jessie Jones
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service Inc
Total Pages: 68
Release: 2012
Genre: American drama (Comedy)
ISBN: 9780822227113

THE STORY: ...And, yes, it's set in Texas! This deliriously funny Southern-fried farce finds the Verdeen cousins of Sweetgum, Texas--Gaynelle, Peaches and Jimmie Wyvette--teetering on the brink of disaster again. Gaynelle, frustrated and frazzled from

Farce of Habit

Farce of Habit
Author: Jessie Jones
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service, Inc.
Total Pages: 67
Release: 2017-09-29
Genre: Drama
ISBN: 0822236869

Comic fireworks explode in FARCE OF HABIT, an absurdly funny Southern-fried romp that takes us back to the Reel ’Em Inn, the finest little fishing lodge in the Ozarks. The proprietor, D. Gene Wilburn, is looking forward to a peaceful weekend on the lake. But there are only two chances of that happening: slim and none. Why, for example, has his wife, Wanelle, picked these three days to white-knuckle her way through caffeine withdrawal? Why is his son Ty’s marriage to Jenna falling apart so fast? Could it have something to do with the French can-can costume Ty is wearing? How on earth would D. Gene’s feisty sister, Maxie, allow herself to get caught up in such a bizarre undercover police assignment? And that’s just his family. If this isn’t enough to thwart D. Gene’s weekend plans, he’s got a gaggle of nuns who’ve converged on the Inn, hell-bent on experiencing a nature retreat—which might be tolerable if D. Gene didn’t have a chronic fear of anything in a habit. Add to this the presence of Jock McNair, a nationally known relationship guru whose colossal ego threatens everyone’s sanity; a shy retiree anxious to cut loose and embrace his “inner caveman” and a couple of wild women who may or may not be who they claim to be. Throw in the storm of the century that’s fast bearing down on Mayhew, Arkansas, and D. Gene has no prayer of baiting a hook any time soon. Oh, and did we mention there’s an axe murderer on the loose? If you enjoy gloriously preposterous hilarity, then laughing your way through the take-no-prisoners lunacy of a Jones Hope Wooten comedy is one habit you’ll never want to break!

Doublewide, Texas

Doublewide, Texas
Author: Jessie Jones, Nicholas Hope, Jamie Wooten
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service, Inc.
Total Pages: 54
Release: 2016-05-13
Genre: Drama
ISBN: 0822233630

THE STORY: In this hilarious, fast-paced comedy, the inhabitants of one of the smallest trailer parks in Texas—four doublewides and a shed—are thrown for a loop when they realize the nearby town of Tugaloo is determined to annex them. And it’s not as if they don’t already have enough to deal with. Joveeta Crumpler has had it up to here, having been passed over again for a promotion at work. On top of this, she has an ongoing battle to keep her feisty mother, Caprice, out of the local bar and worries that her good-ol’-boy brother, Baby Crumpler, is taking his participation in a womanless beauty pageant way too seriously. Joveeta’s big-hearted best friend, Georgia Dean Rudd, is struggling to keep her diner and finances afloat, but she just can’t curb her impulse to take in every stray cat, possum, and armadillo that wanders by. Then there’s Big Ethel Satterwhite, who’s nobody’s fool. But tough as she is, she’s continually frustrated by her clients at Stairway To Heaven Retirement Village as well as her mule-headed husband, O.C., who shows far more affection for his BarcaLounger than he does for Big Ethel. And all the residents are plagued by Haywood Sloggett, the curmudgeon from across the road, who loathes their “trailer-trash” ways, especially their keeping a life-size illuminated nativity scene up year ’round. But these friends, enemies, and neighbors realize they’ll have to work together to defeat the encroaching annexation if they—and their way of life—have a snowball’s chance to survive being swallowed up by “the big guys.” The rollicking mayhem of this flat-out funny Jones Hope Wooten comedy escalates as the residents attempt to secede from Texas, discover a traitor in their midst, and turn the tables in a surprising and side-splitting finale. So grab your Stetson and come on over to Doublewide, Texas, where life is double the fun, double the joy, and where audiences double over with laughter!

Food Lovers' Guide to® Queens

Food Lovers' Guide to® Queens
Author: Meg Cotner
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
Total Pages: 417
Release: 2012-12-04
Genre: Travel
ISBN: 0762792590

The Best Restaurants, Markets & Local Culinary Offerings The ultimate guides to the food scene in their respective states or regions, these books provide the inside scoop on the best places to find, enjoy, and celebrate local culinary offerings. Engagingly written by local authorities, they are a one-stop for residents and visitors alike to find producers and purveyors of tasty local specialties, as well as a rich array of other, indispensable food-related information including: • Favorite restaurants and landmark eateries • Farmers markets and farm stands • Specialty food shops, markets and products • Food festivals and culinary events • Places to pick your own produce • Recipes from top local chefs • The best cafes, taverns, wineries, and brewpubs

Well Fed 2

Well Fed 2
Author: Melissa Joulwan
Publisher: Greenleaf Book Group
Total Pages: 88
Release: 2013-10-22
Genre: Cooking
ISBN: 0989487504

"Grain, sugar, legume, dairy free, Whole 30 approved"--Cover.

Dare to Bloom

Dare to Bloom
Author: Zim Flores
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Total Pages: 225
Release: 2020-12-08
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 1400218659

Either by choice or by circumstance, we all encounter times of starting over. Seasons of hardships, abundance, seeking, and struggle all have a purpose because growth demands change. Dare to Bloom urges us to be both vulnerable and resilient in new seasons of life as we boldly position ourselves for what God has for us next. Serial entrepreneur and author, Zim Flores (neè Ugochukwu), reveals the challenges she's faced and how even her failures have helped shape her sense of purpose. Her parents had big plans for her life. The daughter of Nigerian immigrants, Zim Flores was uprooted from her community as a young girl, marking the beginning of her quest for true identity. Though she experienced unprecedented worldly success as a teenager and young adult, Zim declares that even when we feel pressured by the world around us, our true identity is never at risk. In Dare to Bloom, Zim offers practical and hard-won truths about: How to reclaim your true identity How to surrender your desired outcomes to God How to move forward after broken friendships How to find comfort during your darkest hours How to navigate new beginnings with hope for whatever is next How to joyfully participate in your own story--even when you don't know what the future holds Dare to Bloom is a powerful gift for readers in times of transition or struggle who need a reminder that their true identity never changes. It empowers those who feel stuck in their current circumstances to follow God obediently into the unknown, finding joy in each new beginning. Inside you'll find: Breathtaking photography from Zim's travels Thoughtful questions for reflection at the end of each chapter Zimisms--wisdom-filled phrases from the author When everything changes around us, it can be easy to think that we're only as good as our last success. Though our identities are challenged day by day, Dare to Bloom encourages us to reclaim our identity in God, who is unchanging through it all.

The Shadow Cipher

The Shadow Cipher
Author: Laura Ruby
Publisher: Walden Pond Press
Total Pages: 430
Release: 2017
Genre: Adventure stories
ISBN: 9781536438963

A debut entry in an alternate-history series depicts three kids who try to solve a modern-world puzzle and complete a treasure hunt laid into the streets and buildings of New York City.

A Doublewide, Texas Christmas

A Doublewide, Texas Christmas
Author: Jessie Jones
Publisher: Dramatists Play Service, Inc.
Total Pages: 67
Release: 2018-06-18
Genre: Drama
ISBN: 0822237938

In this outrageously funny comedy, it’s Christmas-time in the newest—and tiniest—town in Texas. And it’s beginning to look a lot like trouble in Doublewide. Not only are the trailer park residents dealing with the stress of the holiday season, but they’ve just discovered that Doublewide is being doubled-crossed by the County. With their official incorporation papers in jeopardy, this band of eccentric Texans throw themselves into taking on the “Big Guys.” Determined to bolster their legitimacy, they first set their sights on the County-wide “Battle of The Mangers” competition. They conspire to win this smackdown with their “Nativity At The Alamo” entry…by any means possible. In addition to that shaky undertaking and trying almost single-handedly to keep the new town afloat, Mayor Joveeta Crumpler has to wrangle her celebrity-obsessed mother, her beleaguered brother who’s being bullied by a pack of vengeful raccoons, and her demoralized best friend who’s at the end of her rope from dating every loser this side of the Rio Grande. To make matters worse, Joveeta finds herself increasingly wary of the newest resident, Patsy Price. Patsy, fresh out of the local mental institution, clearly has her own devious agenda and the County competition over in Fayro is just the place for her to settle an old score. By the time this full-tilt rocket ride of lunacy climaxes in a what-else-can-go-wrong live television presentation, you’ll have doubled your Christmas spirit. So spend the Yuletide in Doublewide and let this hilarious Jones Hope Wooten Comedy make your Christmas merry and bright…because there’s no place like a good ol’ Texas-sized mobile home for the holidays!