In spite of leaps and bounds in both society and technology, there are still some truths that remain universal. The sky is blue, ice cream is delicious, and nothing adjusts a bratty attitude quite like a sound spanking. While the latter is an immutable fact, sadly not all Caregivers are prepared to provide their Little or Middle with the sort of no-nonsense discipline they need in order to truly thrive. Fortunately, Clarine Klein - renowned Professor of Spankology - has condensed two decades worth of meticulous research in the Disciplinary Arts into an easy (and fun!) to read manual guaranteed to provide you with everything you need to give a spanking by the book! Topics covered in this spanktastic guide include: How to give an effective scolding. A deep dive into Supplementary Punishments such as early bedtimes, mouth-soaping, and diapers / pull-ups. A detailed overview of the five types of spankings, including Attitude Adjustments, Spankings for Encouragement, and Maintenance Spankings. A comprehensive guide of recommended Spanking Positions and Implements as well as how best to use them. A step-by-step walk-through of every facet of giving your Little or Middle the sort of spanking that is guaranteed to produce long-lasting results. And so much more! == Please Note == that this book is intended for adults engaging in CONSENTING ageplay, spanking, and other related kinks only! NO CHILD SHOULD EVER BE HIT FOR DISCIPLINE I don't care if you grew up as a wooden spoon survivor, or were like me and just had a bone-deep interest in spanking since before you can remember. Unlike the tantalizing nonsense in this book, actual scientists have proven time and time again that corporal punishment does not work to improve behavior and is both harmful and abusive to those who receive it. To that end, allow me to clarify that this book is meant to be a parody of those god awful raising your kids the "right" way through old-fashioned Christian fundamentalism and spanking books (Looking at you Dare to Discipline, God, the Rod, and your Child's Bod, and all the dreck written by the Pearls), and as such it is not to be taken as any sort of endorsement of those sorts of parenting styles. Because, yeah. They're gross.