To get some much-needed pink, he’ll have to find the missing link… Billy James Hoyt is a down-on-his-luck, red-blooded American man in 1981 rural Oregon. His mullet is perfectly kept, his farmboy muscles worked to perfection from a lifetime of construction work, and his trailer has functional plumbing. But he has no one to share it with until his eccentric best friend, Tony B Loehne, comes up with the perfect poon-hearted plan: find, seduce, and fool around with Bigfoot. Billy is skeptical, until he gets an eyeful–and handful–of the vivacious wild woman for himself. Taken aback by the life-changing experience, but not wanting to disappoint Tony with the truth that sasquatch chose Billy instead of him, our unlikely hero has to search for the key to his wild heart while juggling an expired six-pack of lies that would churn even the most hardened roughneck’s stomach. “A triumphant masterpiece of hopeful nihilism.” – My Boss “I still love you even after reading this, and I don’t know if I like what that says about me.” – My Girlfriend